March 23, 2007
If we didn't have solid and dashed yellow lines painted all over the expressways, driving would be chaotic, crashes would be constant. Take Wal-Mart for instance. No cart lanes, and that's why you get the lady with three kids sitting with her cart in the middle of the aisle, going backwards from everyone else, oblivious to others around her. Now, if yellow paint solved our highway problem, and it's evident that yellow paint could increase the logistical efficiency in our supermarkets as well, perhaps yellow paint could regulate our personal behavior as well. Take Joe GunToter for instance, "la dee dah, I think I'll go shoot my neighbor, let's go get my handgun...huh? what's this?" If we force handguns to be stored in cases painted similarly to no-parking zones, perhaps our psychees would innately understand that this is probably not a good idea, or at least we'd be scared of getting a ticket and bumping our insurance rates. It's time we painted this nation yellow...and dashed on occasion.