February 26, 2010

Why Herbert Hoover Sucked: The Song

#31. Herbert Hoover

Am, Em, G, D
Started to feel a little under the weather
But before we’d gotten fully depressed
the Hawley Smoot bill came along
Promised to put us back to work, couldn’t have been more wrong

C, G, D/F#, Em

Hoover shot the first bullet
In the global tariff war
Tried to protect us from overseas
And instead he bankrupted our citizenry

it raised the tariff to 42, the highest we would do
tried to protect our  business
forgetting they’re made of Americans
that don’t just buy American

the other countries raised tariffs high
said, I’ll show you mine
I’ll show you mine
boy I’m feeling depressed

February 26, 2010

Why Calvin Coolidge Sucked: The Song

#30. Calvin Coolidge

Capo 5
Am, C, G, D/F#

no birds
no planes
no you can’t fly without me, Calvin

air commerce act
put flying under my wing, Calvin

‘cause man can’t be in charge of flight
Who do you think you are? wilbur wright?
It’s too scary
You need a mommy
that’s what we’ll be

Make the rules and regulate
License pilots out the gate
Certify the planes
And paint the yellow on the lanes
Make the routes and navigate
Radio to keep ‘em straight
You need a mommy
that’s what we’ll be

‘cause man can’t be in charge of flight
Who do you think you are? wilbur wright?
It’s too scary
You need a mommy
that’s what we’ll be

8 hours later on the tarmac at O’hare
1 bag’s at JFK, the other lost along the way

you can thank me for it all
just think of where you’d be without me
probably on time

February 25, 2010

I Want to Become More Masculine

When I was younger, I saw that most men were idiots. Selfish. Oblivious to the world around them. Completely emotional insensitive. So, I decided not to be like that. And I get along much better with girls for precisely that reason. I notice haircuts. I pick up on emotions. But, I watch a show like "Man vs. Wild" and want to be that guy, too. Mr. Testosterone. Because it's just so freakin' cool. And isn't THAT what a real man is? Now, please refrain from the "you should love yourself exactly the way you are" speech. I believe that idea resigns ourselves to the idea that we are, without regard to anything we do, already perfect. Whereas my worldview says quite the opposite. I am in a quest to become better. And that quest now leads down the path of being able to tackle and kill a cheetah in mid-pounce.

February 24, 2010

Why Do Bands Break Up?

For the record, I have absolutely no desire to disband my current band. I think my guitarist is a genius. But, it got me thinking, why do we work so well together? And what makes bigger bands - some at the height of fame - disband? Any thoughts?

February 23, 2010

We Can No Longer Choose to Do Nothing

In one voice, we cry out, "Yes, we can." Here's the problem with this statement that's so recklessly thrown about in the political realm. The implication is that absolutely any policy created would be better than the status quo. That's simply untrue. There are millions of policies you could create for healthcare, global warming, taxation that would be much more universally destructive than our current ones. Let's take global warming. If you follow this political issue, you would know that their are two majority schools of thought in the political realm. 1) Impose a $90/ton tax on carbon emissions. 2) Ignore the problem and hope it goes away. Now, we naturally assume this second group of people are idiots. But, that's also assuming that the $90/ton calculation is somehow appropriate. The Copenhagen Consensus, which I cite often on this blog, because of their economic results-driven policies, claims that the best possible economic end-game would be to tax carbon emissions $0.50/ton today and increase this by 5% each year until 2090. They also claim that this is nearly the only way for regulation to produce a net gain in benefit. So, if you're on the $90/ton bandwagon yelling at the opposition that doing nothing is not an option, it's simply not true. It is actually a better economic option than your proposal. It's simply not disguised as "progress."

February 19, 2010

…And The Two Shall Become One

I am a big believer that the healthiest marriages start from healthy friendships - simply because that's how my own began. But, it makes sense. Because loving her is not a sacrifice when I understand that what's best for her is best for me as well. You take her hopes as your own. She takes on yours. If she succeeds, you win. If you're victorious, she celebrates. There's no competition, because there's no separation of spoils (we'll talk about the pitfalls of "separate bank accounts" some other time.) In Mark 10:8, there's a record of Jesus talking about marriage by using the poetic phrase, "and the two shall become one." I don't think it's just poetry. I think it's a brilliant understanding of the reciprocal, mutual-beneficial awesomeness of a "sacrificial" marriage.

February 18, 2010

Why I Am a Bad Friend

While I am truly happy for my friends when they have good news, there also comes a measure of jealousy along with it if they're celebrating something that I don't have. For example, when I hear of a friend's pregnancy, I'm slightly disappointed, as it reminds me that I am not in that same situation. When I hear of a friend's financial success, I am slightly jealous, knowing that being in that same situation could make a lot of my future ambitions come a lot faster. If I truly loved these people as much as much as I love myself, wouldn't their happiness be my own as well? ...which is a perfect lead-in to tomorrow's final chapter of our accidental "week in friendship".

February 17, 2010

How to Know Who Your Real Friends Are

E-mail a bunch of your friends and graciously ask them for their help moving you to a new residence. The ones who agree are the special ones.

February 16, 2010

I Can’t Say That! They’re My Friends.

Let's say your friend has a really bad habit. They're making a poor lifestyle choice or they're being socially insensitive to the world without even realizing it. Shouldn't we, as their friends, be the ones telling them to quit it? Or at least help them understand the perception the world has of their action? But, no. We don't. Because...we're their friends, and we don't want them to get mad at us. After all, it might be awkward. But if we can't be honest with our friends, who else is going to do it?

February 15, 2010

At What Point Do You Give Up on a Friendship?

I've had friends for a long time now... that I get absolutely nothing out of. And I'm aware that friendship is not solely about how the relationship benefits me. Frankly, that's the only reason I've lasted this long - the idea that I'm offering some sort of benefit to these people. But, their personalities simply don't match mine. I don't enjoy talking with or being with them. So my question for the day is, have you ever intentionally cut ties with a long-term friendship, and how did you do it?